The Sharing of Conversation - a profound loss

One of the hardest aspects of losing my husband is not the loss of physical sharing like that of dinner, dancing, walking or watching a movie together. Don’t get me wrong, losing the ability to share those activities is a huge and quite unbeareable loss in a close relationship, but it’s the sharing of conversation and the intangible awareness of one another that bites deep into you.

When I lost Michael I didn’t just lose a husband who was the fabulous father of my children and partner in life, I lost the spiritual aspect of him. The man with whom I shared my thoughts views, expectations, disappointments and high-fives.

Michael had a very perceptive view on most things and when he explained the angle he was looking at things from, it often brought clarity to the subject that may have lacked substance at first glance. His sharp perception would also often lead us into very deep philosophical discussions. 

He would skillfully draw discourse from me that would reveal some astounding thoughts and ideas that would never have reached the surface of my mind had he not opened the well and encouraged it to gush.

With few words he could steer any conversation in any direction he wanted and he would listen without interruption and in the end praise the speaker for their insightful viewpoint.   Yes, he was indeed a superb listener and an outstanding conversationalist.

Our conversations were filled with banter and laughter.  We had a matching sense of humor and we laughed together at things that many times only we found funny. 

Yes, the thoughts, ideas, opinions and laughter we shared is the essence of what made us a couple.  I miss that sharing. I miss that conversation.  I miss you Michael.